gentlemen so check it out I like the idea of tattoos whenever I see a guy and he’s got like some sick-ass sweet sleeve I think dude is a badass but there is a razor thin line between badass and dumbass
I should know because I was the proud owner of super Sikh crescent moon on my leg and a bumblebee on my back mm-hmm you bet I was making the ladies swoon with those two sweet pieces gentlemen the total cost of my two amazingly masculine dancers a hundred and fifteen dollars…. the cost to remove them eight hundred plus two damn years of painful laser removal treatment
so as you see I have a love-hate relationship with tattoos I hated mine I love some other peoples but I also see a lot that I just go oh dude you gentlemen an attempt to keep you from making the same mistake I did today we’re going over ten tattoo don’ts
number one don’t ever get your girl’s name tattooed anywhere on your body I know she’s magic you met three months ago and she is the love of your life will dude marry her just don’t get her name tattooed because a marriage is a whole lot easier to get rid of than somebody’s name tattooed on your body besides trying to explain to your new girlfriend that Sheila with the heart elf was your cat it’s kind of a tough sell,
tattoo don’t number two three and four don’t tattoo your face your neck or your hand who are you pissed at why would you think in the realm of tattoo placement options that your face your neck or your hands is a good option you’ve got a sea of skin on the rest of your body but if you can’t cover it with a dress shirt you don’t need to be doing it you want to single handedly eliminate 95% of your potential employment options tattoo your face neck and hands dude that’s discrimination if I can’t know dude thats stupidity on your part
tattooed don’t number five no back tats that is a tramp stamp and that’s chicks tattoos
don’t number six do not get your fraternity letters tattooed on your body or do and that way I know that I don’t want to actually be friends with you um um I wish I could say I’m kidding but whenever I see a guy and he’s got like siga 4 Sigma Pi or beta cap epsilon delivery I automatically think that the guy is a douche I am probably totally wrong but in my experience well it’s actually pretty accurate.
tattoos don’t number seven dont get portraits of your kids now it’s a loving gesture and I know you absolutely love your kids but I’ve never actually seen it not look weird all the kids faces never look natural they’re always like kind of smiling distorted just where they look to form if you’re ever wondering why when you show people your daughter’s picture they go oh what is she! so cute names of your kids cool pictures of them don’t tattoo!
don’t number eight don’t go with what’s trendy and popular and if you don’t believe me just ask all the dudes out there with barbed wire bands tribal anything or Asian symbol stork dork dork dork I can say that a bumblebee at a moon for God’s sake
tattoo don’t number nine don’t get anything on your body that you wouldn’t be proud to show grandma ma Nana
last but certainly not least tattooed own number ten don’t be impulsive take it from the king of impulse tattoos you need to think through what you’re getting on your body because unlike piercing your ears unlike cutting your air tattoos they’re pretty permanent the best tattoos have a story have a meaning are special to you and those are the ones that you’re going to be proud to wear for years to come, one day you’re just like yeah I like that put it there those are the ones you tend to regret bringing us to the very important point ever go to a tattoo parlor when under the influence of anything including lust like when you’re like ooh move you see look right there now definitely don’t do that gentlemen here’s the deal if you’ve got a tattoo that you’re absolutely ashamed of and you wish you didn’t do there are some options and treatments out there to get them off of your damn body and I actually did a video where I did a bunch of videos I took you through the process of me having laser tattoo removal done if you want to check out the last video and then you can find all the other videos there’s a link down below in the description gentlemen tattoos when done right and appropriately Oh hmm so damn cool but there is a fine line between great and god-awful please do us both a favor next time before you go and send the chair think before you ink
As found on Youtube